Ending emotional violence — how a miracle transformed Margaret’s despair into hope

Emotional violence. It might not be a term you’re familiar with. But it’s something people all over the world deal with every day.

All types of emotional abuse fall under this label — being called bad names, being humiliated on purpose in front of others, being made to feel unwanted or being threatened with abandonment. And it’s a major problem among women and girls in Kenya. 

In fact, 1 in 4 women in the 2010 Kenya Violence Against Children Study reported experiencing emotional violence before the age of 18. The 2019 Kenya Violence Against Children Survey looked into the perpetrators more closely. About 7% of the women surveyed experienced emotional violence from a parent, adult caregiver or adult relative during childhood. 

Margaret is one Kenyan woman who knows about emotional abuse all too well. Before she arrived at our Safe House in Kenya, she faced it daily from the adults in her life who were supposed to protect her. Here’s her story.

From emotional turmoil to a heart of peace

Margaret was born HIV positive to a young prostitute, and when she was 2 years old, her mother died of AIDS. After that she went to live with her grandmother and other family members. Life was not easy there and as Margaret got older, her situation got harder and her family got more abusive. They would make fun of her and call her names, and the children didn’t want to play with her because she was HIV positive.

“Nobody wanted to take care of me,” says Margaret. “Nobody wanted to touch me or to be near me. And even my aunties, my uncles or anybody who was close to me, they didn’t want to get involved with me. They would always tell their kids, ‘Don’t go near that kid. Stay away from her.’ I never got love from anyone.”

When her grandmother died, Margaret was forced to sleep on the cold kitchen floor with no blankets and had to find her own food. Once again, her life was upturned and and she was reminded that no one wanted her.

“The whole family gathered in the house and they were talking, discussing how they would chase me away so that I can just go live in the streets.”

Her uncle came, promising to give her a better life and let her go to school, but this was far from the truth. He hired her out as a house girl and tore up her papers allowing her to ever attend school. She couldn’t take it anymore so she ran away. Living on the streets was hard. She believed she had no future and no hope. Life became so unbearable for her that she tried to commit suicide.

“Then a miracle happened.”

A social worker connected her to the Safe House. And everything changed from there. The Safe House provided all the things she needed to live a healthy, fulfilled life, including food, health care, clothing and more. And she received love.

“I never thought I deserved to be loved throughout my life. But here I have somebody who can hug me, tell me I’m important and tell me how worthy I am.”

At 20 years old, Margaret is now a strong, loving young lady and is growing in the Lord by leaps and bounds. She has a zest for life. She loves watching movies, telling stories and hugging everyone. Her heart is soft and ready to give love to all. Since finishing high school, she is preparing to go to college and hopes to study Special Education.

“I want to work with the mentally and physically handicapped. I never want anyone to feel like I felt, unwanted and unloved, that they have no future, no matter their situation. I want to give back and love them and teach them so they never feel the way I felt for so long.”

At Just1, our aim is to empower the young women in our care to discover their unique purpose and bring their dreams to life. Through the support of people like you, Margaret is on her way to doing just that.

2 ways to give wings to their dreams

Unsurprisingly, the Kenya Violence Against Children reports also showed that women who experienced emotional violence before age 18 were significantly more likely to report feeling anxious and depressed — and to have thoughts of suicide — than those who didn’t suffer from that kind of abuse during childhood. What’s more, people who experience such violence are more likely to accept being treated that way in the future.

That’s why we are so grateful Margaret was brought to our Safe House where she has learned how worthy she is. Her self assurance has given her the confidence to imagine and plan for a future where she can give back to others. Her wish is to have the funding to finish college so she can get her degree and achieve her goals. 

You can be a part of helping the young women in our care reach their full potential in two ways.

• Join The Family, our community of monthly donors bringing freedom and restoration to women and children rescued from slavery and exploitation. Your monthly donation will help provide everything rescued survivors need to be restored and live fulfilled lives. That includes housing, food, therapy, clothing, medical care and school fees.

• Visit our donation page to make a one-time or recurring contribution. Your gift will give children the chance to live a life free of exploitation.